The Caring Corner :)

[FaeMinx]

The grounding effects of other people..... of other people... grounding effects.... people..


Oh snap!


That's what went wrong.

 

[Null]

This struck a chord with me.

 

[Løra (Lolla)]

I understand indeed. But sometimes it's required for self preservation (relevant to all the above)

 

[Null]

Just don't do it for too long otherwise you'll turn into me.

 

[Null]

http://is.gd/r51xmaMy depression has somehow picked up how to do it, which has led to some occurrences that I'd rather forget.

 

[DrHAX]

My fiancee isn't going to college due to them tacking on an addition 10k to the 10k she already had to pay before even setting foot in the door.. So she's saying F it and moving in with her father in order to pursue other things and try to ground out her life. My crappy job is slowly eating away at my sanity, and so is my ability to keep happy to some extent. I'm exhausted.. My hand has healed fully which makes me happy my finger no longer clicks  (If you saw what happened a few months ago you'll know my knuckle kissed the spinning blade of an angle grinder.) I'm struggling to just get by and even get out of bed. I've been having nightmares recently.. I still have yet to get my license... Almost got it last test but I was failed by 1 point... at least now I can legally drink in this country. But not even a nice glass of Merlot can help ease how I feel. I feel unstable... and uneasy. My parents are ridding me and their negativity is just making me hate everything just a bit more.... Favourite conversation topic of thiers was "What are you going to do if your fiancee leaves you in college?!" Well I guess they longer have to worry about that. :angry:  I don't mean to sound whiny or bring people down.. Honestly I didn't even realize I had this on my chest and until I  started typing. :blink:  I'm beyond stressed...

I'm starting to notice a lot more grey hairs in my beard, and I'm only 21.... 21 and feel like I have no future or hope.

 

[kasp]

My fiancee isn't going to college due to them tacking on an addition 10k to the 10k she already had to pay before even setting foot in the door.. So she's saying F it and moving in with her father in order to pursue other things and try to ground out her life. My crappy job is slowly eating away at my sanity, and so is my ability to keep happy to some extent. I'm exhausted.. My hand has healed fully which makes me happy my finger no longer clicks  (If you saw what happened a few months ago you'll know my knuckle kissed the spinning blade of an angle grinder.) I'm struggling to just get by and even get out of bed. I've been having nightmares recently.. I still have yet to get my license... Almost got it last test but I was failed by 1 point... at least now I can legally drink in this country. But not even a nice glass of Merlot can help ease how I feel. I feel unstable... and uneasy. My parents are ridding me and their negativity is just making me hate everything just a bit more.... Favourite conversation topic of thiers was "What are you going to do if your fiancee leaves you in college?!" Well I guess they longer have to worry about that. :angry:  I don't mean to sound whiny or bring people down.. Honestly I didn't even realize I had this on my chest and until I  started typing. :blink:  I'm beyond stressed...

I'm starting to notice a lot more grey hairs in my beard, and I'm only 21.... 21 and feel like I have no future or hope.

Don't worry about getting a few greys at 21. I started going grey at 8, was salt and peppery when I was 16 and well at 31 now I am greyer than most 50 year olds.  Noone gives a shit and if you are a bloke you can wear it easily.

As for the rest don't stress it, take some time and work out a direction you want your life to go.  Then try your best to make it happen, also don't worry if it doesn't work out.  Too many people worry about failing when the truth is failing is part of life and who cares if something doesn't pan out.

 

[Løra (Lolla)]

@DrHax I absolutely agree with what kasp said. It's good to have a general idea of direction - a goal etc - but don't let it be the be all and end all. Please don't put too much pressure on yourself or you'll break. Too many people do that. I never see things as "failure", per se, but that 'maybe that wasn't meant to be', 'maybe there was a reason for this and that' etc; I find that helps with keeping sanity.


At the end of the day, you have a fiancee that loves you so much, that she committed herself to you - lots of people don't have that. As long as you both use that as a foundation, everything else on top of that is a bonus .


Maybe more hobbies would be good too (one that doesn't involve blades etc ).


And hey, 1 point difference in a driving test is nothing. You'll get that easily next time.


I know how difficult it is when you feel everything is going wrong, or that everything is changing in a negative way. It's very hard but I believe it's absolutely possible to get through, and that there's - excuse the clichè'd line - always a light at the end of the tunnel. Just focus on that, and allow your partner to support you.


To everybody: That goes for everyone here too. Try and stay positive, and support one another; but more importantly, allow yourself to be supported. It's never a weakness to seek and accept any kind of help and be open and share what's in your heart. It's ok to be afraid too. And gosh knows, I'm in the same boat .


*huggles to all*

 

[rygD]

I'm starting to notice a lot more grey hairs in my beard, and I'm only 21

I have had some, at least on my head (I was reuired to remove facial hair for a long time), since I was around that age as well, as did many other people I know.  I don't know if they are actually grey, though, as they are pure white.  I have brown, red, black, blond and white hairs growing out of my face, with slightly lighter colors coming out of my scalp, with a lot more blond mixed in, and some seem almost clear...

So, yeah, "going a little grey" at that age doesn't seem uncommon.  I haven't had too many new ones appear in ten years, and things have been far more stressful during this time (however I have wished my hair would just turn grey or white since I was around 16).  If you are one of those people that is concerned about going bald just be happy you aren't dealing with that.  I worked with a few guys that started losing their hair in their early 20s, and 2 of them were extremely bothered by it, and one was even doing a combover to try to hide it.  I will probably just do like Jean-Luc Picard if it happens to me.

I do want to touch on the other stuff you mentioned.  Life sucks.  It usually doesn't get any easier.  Do the best you can with whatever happens and try not to get too caught up in how shitty everything seems (much easier said than done).  Remain flexible and open to opportunities and things might turn out in interesting ways you never expected.

Don't worry about getting a few greys at 21. I started going grey at 8, was salt and peppery when I was 16 and well at 31 now I am greyer than most 50 year olds.  Noone gives a shit and if you are a bloke you can wear it easily.

Exactly.  Kasp is a lucky bastard.  I don't mind my grey/white hairs, but I do get tired of people commenting on them when they happen to be a bit more visible on certain days.  Guess what, they are there and I like them so stop with the "oh noes".

Maybe more hobbies would be good too (one that doesn't involve blades etc ).

Nah, blades are fine.  Maybe hobbies with MORE blades will be better.  Just try to be more careful and learn from the injuries.  My hands are covered with scars from being cut open, and the worst was from tripping in some woods and landing on a piece of a broken beer bottle someone threw at a log (this was when I was a little kid, next to my school).  My fingers have lots of interesting marks on them, including one that I can't remember if it is from a knife or a soldering iron.  Oh, and a messed up knuckle, but that is from less productive activities that it is probably best blades were not involved in.

And hey, 1 point difference in a driving test is nothing. You'll get that easily next time.

That is one I almost forgot to mention.  I hate driving.  I don't have much choice where I currently live.  If DrHAX doesn't mind the people he could consider moving somewhere that a car is not required to get around easily.  I didn't mind riding trains, subways and busses since it saved me money and I had less stuff to worry about (car maintenance, registration, insurance, theft, license, etc.).

It's very hard but I believe it's absolutely possible to get through, and that there's - excuse the clichè'd line - always a light at the end of the tunnel. Just focus on that

I dunno about that.  One important lesson I learned from Looney Tunes is that sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel is a train or truck, and sometimes it is what you are chasing.  Sometimes there really isn't a tunnel, and it is just a painting to deceive you.  There are important life lessons in these cartoons.

That goes for everyone here too. Try and stay positive

No!

 

[DrHAX]

Its not really the test or anything thats bumming me.. its more I feel like I'm just going around in circles...I need something different in my life. I'm a gear head at heart.. I'm a very mechanical person.  I have somebody coming to looking at a parts car I have so I'm hoping to sell it off and get something different. :unsure:  Its just at times I'm sick of other people and how they react towards me. Especially my parents. Everybody else is supportive yet my parents know exactly what to say to make even the happiest moment turn into the Hindenburg. It's amazing really... they just can't accept happiness I feel, or happiness that isn't linked to them  <_< . I'm just trying to get a solid foot hold on life and just trying not let the world bring me down.

Some days I love the world, Some days I really am tempted to just walk off into the woods carrying an axe and a machete and just live off of the land and turn away from society. h34r:  I've been having an F load more of the later then the former.

Just wish me a sale on the vw parts car and lets see what falls into place. I need a pick me up in my life.. on the positive I got one of my pandoras up and running with libreoffice so now I can at least write a little bit.. that should help my sanity some.

 

[Løra (Lolla)]

Some days I really am tempted to just walk off into the woods carrying an axe and a machete and just live off of the land and turn away from society. h34r: I've been having an F load more of the later then the former.

I hear ya. Likewise.

And good luck with the sale

 

[Null]

@DrHAX Life does enjoy throwing people curveballs but things do eventually get better. Also don't forget the golden rule alcohol and saw blades don't mix.

 

[rygD]

Some days I really am tempted to just walk off into the woods carrying an axe and a machete and just live off of the land and turn away from society. h34r: I've been having an F load more of the later then the former.

I hear ya. Likewise.

Maybe more of us should do it instead of just thinking about it.  If it isn't obvious, I frequently consider options like this as well.

 

[Null]

Interesting article is interesting. http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/what-does-it-mean-to-just-be-yourself/

 

[Løra (Lolla)]

Some days I really am tempted to just walk off into the woods carrying an axe and a machete and just live off of the land and turn away from society. h34r: I've been having an F load more of the later then the former.

I hear ya. Likewise.

Maybe more of us should do it instead of just thinking about it.  If it isn't obvious, I frequently consider options like this as well.

Could make a little community from the community..

 

[DrHAX]

Some days I really am tempted to just walk off into the woods carrying an axe and a machete and just live off of the land and turn away from society. h34r: I've been having an F load more of the later then the former.

I hear ya. Likewise.

Maybe more of us should do it instead of just thinking about it.  If it isn't obvious, I frequently consider options like this as well.

Could make a little community from the community..

I'd be the blacksmith 

 

[Løra (Lolla)]

Some days I really am tempted to just walk off into the woods carrying an axe and a machete and just live off of the land and turn away from society. h34r: I've been having an F load more of the later then the former.

I hear ya. Likewise.

Maybe more of us should do it instead of just thinking about it. If it isn't obvious, I frequently consider options like this as well.

Could make a little community from the community..

I'd be the blacksmith

I'd be the one that looks after wild animals and does healing and other spiritual things. Or just the weird one

 

[Null]

Or just the weird one

No cutting in line.

 

[kasp]

So I am currently in France and its like everyone is trying to rip me off.

Even had one dude try and kidnap me possibly.  In 2 hours I had a good 3 people try taxi scams on me, countless petition scams, and a few people attempting to pickpocket me. I feel like I have to be on guard all the time.  I love the architecture and the city but I just can't relax.

The guy who tried to maybe kidnap me (or a taxi scam) went down like this. I went to the taxi rank and he looked like one of the attendants, he asked where I was going so I told him and he said ahhh wrong rank.  Being my first time in France I didn't think much of it and he gestured me to follow him.  I did and then just started feeling sus as we walked for longer than I thought it would be to get to another rank.  I just thought as long as I stick to the main road it's fine as it's not like his going to pull a weapon on a street and I am a big guy so his not going to try and overpower me.   We get to this van with no markings and midnight black windows and he opens the back and gestures me to get in.   I just laugh and say he can't be serious and walk off and I think he thought I was going to tell the cops as he just jumped in the van and drove off but wtf is going on France.  

It's one place I am not going to come back to until they fix that shit up.   

 

[DrHAX]

So I am currently in France and its like everyone is trying to rip me off.

Even had one dude try and kidnap me possibly.  In 2 hours I had a good 3 people try taxi scams on me, countless petition scams, and a few people attempting to pickpocket me. I feel like I have to be on guard all the time.  I love the architecture and the city but I just can't relax.

The guy who tried to maybe kidnap me (or a taxi scam) went down like this. I went to the taxi rank and he looked like one of the attendants, he asked where I was going so I told him and he said ahhh wrong rank.  Being my first time in France I didn't think much of it and he gestured me to follow him.  I did and then just started feeling sus as we walked for longer than I thought it would be to get to another rank.  I just thought as long as I stick to the main road it's fine as it's not like his going to pull a weapon on a street and I am a big guy so his not going to try and overpower me.   We get to this van with no markings and midnight black windows and he opens the back and gestures me to get in.   I just laugh and say he can't be serious and walk off and I think he thought I was going to tell the cops as he just jumped in the van and drove off but wtf is going on France.  

It's one place I am not going to come back to until they fix that shit up.   

Yupe can we go start our own little community now? :blink: