(Bad)Joke Appreciation Corner


smp-classic-the-hazards-of-the-oregon-trail
 
What do you get when you cross the ocean with the titanic?
Halfway

Why was the broom late for work?
It Overswept
 
I ordered a book of puns last week, but i didn't get it.
That reminds me this story:
My dad went into the mountains with a group, but when he was there his guide fell down a cliff, not been seen since.
So I asked how he felt about that.
"Don't worry son, the guide was already very old. So it wasn't a big problem for me."
"Also, the guide wasn't very good. I mean it was already missing some pages, so..."
 
He lives in the desert, and talks too much, who is it?
Ali Blah Blah

Did you hear it? They arrested the Energizer bunny.
...
He was charged with... battery

How do you spot a blind man at a nudist beach ?
Its not hard

I hate stairs. They always lead up to something.

My dad used to hit my mom's head with a ruler. Turns out he was measuring her patience.

My dad said never use a watch around your belly. That would be waist of time

Do you think glass coffins will be a hit? Well, remains to be seen.

There are two fish in a tank, and one fish says to the other fish:
“How do you drive this thing?”

My ex still misses me...
But her aim is getting better.

What does James Bond do before going to sleep?
He goes under cover!

Mom!Mom! Dad is throwing stuff out the windooooooooooooooooooooooooow!

Did you hear about the chameleon that couldn't change color? He had reptile dysfunctional

If a child refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?

Kid: Mom, it smells like a dead person
Kid:Mom?
Kid:Mom?

The shovel was a ground breaking invention

I have a speed bump phobia, but I'm slowly getting over it

My doctor said I might go deaf
I haven’t heard from him since then

Why is dark spelled with a “k” and not a “c”?
Coz you can’t see in the dark.

what does a cop yell to his belly button?
...YOU ARE UNDER A VEST!!!...

People ask me where I store all my dad jokes.
In a dad-a-base

Father: there is only one thing that scares me in Halloween
Son: which is?
Father: exactly!

Why aren't Koalas considered bears? ...........
Because they don't have the koalifications!

Why couldn't the bicycle stand up on its own?
It was two tired.
 
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