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An alarm clock is a device for awakening people who don't have small children.
(Bad)Joke Appreciation Corner
- Thread starter Løra (Lolla)
- Start date
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Life is too short for my book of 5 letter words.
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The Royal Mail worker with a fetish for having sex with mail bags has now been removed from his post.
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I went to the inventor of Optrex's funeral today.
There wasn't a dry eye in the house.
There wasn't a dry eye in the house.
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My GPS just told me to turn around.
Now I can't see where I'm driving.
Now I can't see where I'm driving.
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My mum just said to me, "Son, I think you're losing your mind."
"What makes you say that mum?" I replied.
"I died 5 years ago."
"What makes you say that mum?" I replied.
"I died 5 years ago."
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Rykr_munstr
Member
I lost my rutabaga yesterday, I am sure it'll turnup.
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After worrying about my health, a doctor reassured me that the average size of a testicle is at least 2 inches long and 1 inch wide.
Thankfully, mine measure up. All three of them.
Thankfully, mine measure up. All three of them.
FBnil: I really have not a noodle what your joke says for some reason :-S.
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Bit disappointed that my Amish online dating site hasn't taken off yet.
Neelix
Insecticidal Maniac
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We call our grandad "Spiderman".
He hasn't got any super powers - he just finds it difficult to get out of the bath.
He hasn't got any super powers - he just finds it difficult to get out of the bath.
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I've just ended a relationship with a hair stylist.
We never gelled.
We never gelled.
Rykr_munstr
Member
If Iron man and the silver surfer teamed up....would they be alloys?
I don't trust stairs, they are always upto something.
I don't trust stairs, they are always upto something.
Rykr_munstr
Member
A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces: "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw."
When she told me I was average, she was just being mean.
A Zen master walked up to a hot dog vendor and said, "Make me one with everything."
So the vendor made a hot dog with the works for the Zen master and told him it would be two bucks. The Zen master gave him a $5 bill, which the vendor promptly put into the cash drawer. The Zen master then asked, "Where's my change?"
The hot dog vendor replied, "Change must come from within."
When she told me I was average, she was just being mean.
A Zen master walked up to a hot dog vendor and said, "Make me one with everything."
So the vendor made a hot dog with the works for the Zen master and told him it would be two bucks. The Zen master gave him a $5 bill, which the vendor promptly put into the cash drawer. The Zen master then asked, "Where's my change?"
The hot dog vendor replied, "Change must come from within."
Nintendo
Nintendo Switch
A Jewish mate of mine happens to not be circumsized yet...there's no end to the prick!
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I washed my son's mouth out with soap and water today.
If anything, it made him swear even more.
If anything, it made him swear even more.
