lololololol! I think I giggled all the way down the last page! 
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(Bad)Joke Appreciation Corner
- Thread starter Løra (Lolla)
- Start date
what does a dentist call a drink before dinner? aperitif!
Null
Snug
A SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"
Caine
Hardcore Member
^ It was the empty joke, did you like it?
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Seems nobody did this one yet...
It was Noah, yeah? The guy in the Ark, with all the animals. And after he had sailed the sea for 40 days and 40 nights (think of the smell!) he finally ran aground on mount Ararat, opened the bay doors, let all the animals out, gathered them in front of himself one last time and held a small improvised farewell speech:
- Ok, guys and gals. We've survived! Hooray for us! Now, go forth into the world and multiply!
And all the animals did. Except a pair of snakes that complained bitterly.
- But Noah, how could we go out in the world and multiply? We're adders!
So Noah grabbed his axe, trundled away to the nearest little copse of trees, chopped a few of them down, and with a chop, chop here and a saw, saw there he fashioned them into a table. And then he spoke again:
- Now, my dear adders, you may go forth and multiply, for I have built you a table of logs!
*ba-dish*
It was Noah, yeah? The guy in the Ark, with all the animals. And after he had sailed the sea for 40 days and 40 nights (think of the smell!) he finally ran aground on mount Ararat, opened the bay doors, let all the animals out, gathered them in front of himself one last time and held a small improvised farewell speech:
- Ok, guys and gals. We've survived! Hooray for us! Now, go forth into the world and multiply!
And all the animals did. Except a pair of snakes that complained bitterly.
- But Noah, how could we go out in the world and multiply? We're adders!
So Noah grabbed his axe, trundled away to the nearest little copse of trees, chopped a few of them down, and with a chop, chop here and a saw, saw there he fashioned them into a table. And then he spoke again:
- Now, my dear adders, you may go forth and multiply, for I have built you a table of logs!
*ba-dish*
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A large party of mathematicians walks into a bar.
The first mathematician goes up to the barman and says "I'll have a half-pint please"
The second mathmatician goes up to the barman and says "I'll have a quarter of a pint"
The third one says "Can I have an eighth of a pint?"
The forth asks for a sixteenth of a pint...
...and so on...
The barman gets out a pint glass, fills it, and says "Sorry folks, but I really think you should know your limits"
The first mathematician goes up to the barman and says "I'll have a half-pint please"
The second mathmatician goes up to the barman and says "I'll have a quarter of a pint"
The third one says "Can I have an eighth of a pint?"
The forth asks for a sixteenth of a pint...
...and so on...
The barman gets out a pint glass, fills it, and says "Sorry folks, but I really think you should know your limits"
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Null
Snug
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
Neelix
Insecticidal Maniac
If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
- Neelix
- Neelix
what do golfers wear? tee-shirts
Null
Snug
I fear for the calendar, it's days are
numbered.
numbered.
What's a good name for a female author? Paige
What do beavers shout when they're angry? Dam!
Why did the lion get upset when he was cast as an understudy in a play? He wanted the mane part
What do you call a baby elephant wizard? Dumbodore
What school should you go to after dinner? Eton
Why do you feel lost around corn? It's a maize
What do beavers shout when they're angry? Dam!
Why did the lion get upset when he was cast as an understudy in a play? He wanted the mane part
What do you call a baby elephant wizard? Dumbodore
What school should you go to after dinner? Eton
Why do you feel lost around corn? It's a maize
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iprice
Certified Guru
And why do they wear two pairs of trousers? Just in case they get a hole in one.
And what's a good name for a good female author? Paige Turner.
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@iprice: lolololol very good!
Null
Snug
A magician was walking down the street and turned into a grocery store.
A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.
A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.
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And why didn't he get the part?Because he was always lion around.
Poor lion. It's given me paws for thought
Null
Snug
FRED: How do they keep flies out of the kitchen in the school cafeteria?
HARRY: They let them taste the food.
HARRY: They let them taste the food.
What type of shoes do donkeys like to wear? Mules!
