All Americans Are Fat Retards


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Viperman5686

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America is the fattest country in the universe. All of the other planets and countries with sentient beings are much slimmer than any American. Even our babies are fatter than the fattest people in any other location. Look at me, i'm a great example of how fat Americans are.

Let's start off with a mug shot to see my pudgy face.

IM000533.jpg


YUCK! EWWW! Just looking at a picture of myself, I get sick, it looks like I have ten jars of mayonaise in there.

Now lets look at a whole body shot.

IM000545.jpg


Awww, sick! Check out my gigantic legs that have more fat than a blue whale! Look at my flabby arms struggling for air on my T-shirt... Disgusting.

Now, some of you may want to look away, because what you see will frighten you deeply. Some of you with weaker stomachs may be forever scarred. Beware!

IM000547.jpg


GROSS! My love handles are hanging off of my shorts, and I have such a disgusting gut. If anyone says I have a six pack on my stomach, they must be talking about beer.

Now for the final shot. This proves without a doubt that I, and all other Americans, am the epitome of the fat.

AAAAA.jpg


There you have it, my friends, the scales do not lie. I am an earth shattering 153lbs (or 68kg for you non-stupid, non-Americans). Every time I take a step, the richter scales for go off for hundreds of miles. I think it's safe to say that I should definitely stay away from the beaches with this gigantic amount of fat.

NEXT!

All Americans are retarded. Once again, I am a great example of how stupid we Americans really are. I've taken IQ tests in school before, and the last one said my IQ was 144. At first I thought I was really smart, but then I got to thinking... Everything i've read says that the average IQ is around 100, but then again, I'm in an AMERICAN school, and i've only read AMERICAN articles! Nice try, but i'm not fooled by your dodgy reports, America!

We're all so fat and stupid; we don't know anything. All the other countries are right in calling Americans ignorant. When dealing with a country so stupid, blanket stereotypes are totally valid! I for one am sad to live in such a terrible country, and I would move, but since i'm such a stupid American, i'd probably look dumb anywhere I went.
 

clippa

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Hey! Stop dissing the fatties you spotty cunt! ;) I'm british, I'm pretentious and have bad teeth. What's this thread about?
 
M

Magus 86

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Ahh... now I see, Hanz. He made this thread in response to Goity and Sam's pretentiousness, stupidity, and stereotyping in the "Gift Ideas" thread.
 

Viperman5686

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What you lack in obesity you more than make up for in pastyness :p
lol! The flash makes my skin look lighter than it really is, but I am by no means tanned. I wear SPF45 (or higher) whenever I swim because being burnt sucks. Other than that, i've only been burnt once in my life, and that was because we did a lot of driving in Florida when I was on vacation. Skin cancer is bad, yo. :ph34r:
 
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Hanz™

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Ahh... now I see, Hanz. He made this thread in response to Goity and Sam's pretentiousness, stupidity, and stereotyping in the "Gift Ideas" thread.
Yeah I see now.
haha but no. Even with Americans who are not fat or stupid, there is still a large percentage that are...
But the point is that doesn't make the clever or thin people there any more fat/stupid...
And I am not insinuating there is any correlation between either of those words also...
 
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M

Magus 86

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Ah, but of course there is no correlation... If there was, I would be about as stupid as Goity or Sam Fisher, seeing as I am pretty fat.
 

DaveC

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All Americans are retarded. Once again, I am a great example of how stupid we Americans really are. I've taken IQ tests in school before, and the last one said my IQ was 144. At first I thought I was really smart, but then I got to thinking... Everything i've read says that the average IQ is around 100, but then again, I'm in an AMERICAN school, and i've only read AMERICAN articles! Nice try, but i'm not fooled by your dodgy reports, America!

We're all so fat and stupid; we don't know anything. All the other countries are right in calling Americans ignorant. When dealing with a country so stupid, blanket stereotypes are totally valid! I for one am sad to live in such a terrible country, and I would move, but since i'm such a stupid American, i'd probably look dumb anywhere I went.

Well you know, Americans elected Bush.. TWICE!! So most of us must really be a bunch of dumb Jesus freaks right?
 
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Well, according to Michael Moore, we didn't actually elect Bush the first time... And just for the record, I voted for Kerry in 2004(the first year I actually could vote).
 

loz_the_guru

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firstly, michael moore is yet another fat american and therefore cant have anything decent to say about anything.

PHEW. im glad you people are FINALLY admitting it. Although there was no need to lie with the pictures, but I suppose if you want to digitally manipulate them its your choice, we all know the truth anyhow.
 
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If being fat and stupidity were linked I'd be dumber then Bush, as a tip the scales at 340 lbs.(or about 1500 Newtons for the people living in countries that aren't too dumb to use SI). I hate living in a country controlled by Idiots(both fat and skinny). Now I do wish thinness and Intellgence went hand and hand cause then I would be so obese.

P.S. The above statement about America being controlled by idiots was proven by the 2004 election when the majority of people who weren't to lazy to vote reelected Bush. I couldn't vote due the stupid age resrictions(Have to 18 to register, have to register 1 month before election, and I turned 18 2 weeks before election).
 

speedmike

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We, Americans are not all fat, I am one of the 40% that isn't fat. I'm a poor college student so I eat a cup of rice and a can of tuna for dinner 3 outta the 7 days a week :) I'm also voted for Kerry so, If you don't like Bush don't complain to me.

P.S. Not all Americans are the same! Its funny when people generalize the whole country as the same. Any country for that Matter! There are so many races, religions, and such you can't clump us all into one group.
 

tekt5

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Well I honestly don't think that anyone who voted for kerry really wanted to vote for him, they just wanted to vote against bush.

that said, Nader for Pres!
 

DaveC

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We, Americans are not all fat, I am one of the 40% that isn't fat. I'm a poor college student so I eat a cup of  rice and a can of tuna for dinner 3 outta the 7 days a week  :)  I'm also voted for Kerry so, If you don't like Bush don't complain to me.

P.S. Not all Americans are the same! Its funny when people generalize the whole country as the same. Any country for that Matter! There are so many races, religions, and such you can't clump us all into one group.

The southern states are like a different country. Those are the rednecks and religeous freaks that voted Bush in. I wish we could let them have that asshole terrorist Bush, the rest of us could have a decent president.
 
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