(Bad)Joke Appreciation Corner

[Løra (Lolla)]

The Dalai Lama walked into a burger bar and said "make me one with everything".

 

[levi]

 

[Null]

I have a fear of speed bumps.
I'm slowly getting over it.

 

[Fzero]

...I know how you feel Uncle Jack!
I've recently developed a fear of elevators...
...But I'm taking steps to avoid them!

You shouldn't trust atoms...
...They make up everything!

Wanna hear a joke about paper?
...Nope? Don't blame you, it was tearable!

My girlfriend is on a new Tropical Food Diet...
...The house is full of the stuff!
...It's enough to make a mango crazy!

 

[Null]

Which room will you never see a ghost in.
The living room.

 

[Null]

 

[Null]

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
Because they lactose.

 

[Null]

What do you feed an invisible cat?
Evaporated milk.

How do you know the Invisible Man has no children?
Because he's not apparent.

I might have an open casket funeral...
Remains to be seen.

What do you call someone who points out the obvious?
Someone who points out the obvious.

What did Mario say when he broke up with Princess Peach?
It's not you, it's a-me, Mario!

 

[Binky]

What do you call someone who points out the obvious?
Someone who points out the obvious.

When you know that you're in danger,
And there's no room left for doubt.
Who's the superhero,
Who will come and point it out?
CAPTAIN OBVIOUS!

Tom Scott​

 

[Null]

The writer of 'The Hokey Cokey' song has died, it was a struggle getting him in the coffin, they put his left leg in, then the trouble started.

 

[Null]

 

[Løra (Lolla)]

An interesting thing: I asked some cartoon couples what made them get together. They all said they were just drawn together.

 

[Null]

I just read a book about Stockholm syndrome. It was pretty bad at first, but by the end I liked it.

 

[rygD]

An interesting thing: I asked some celebrity cartoon couples what made them get together. They all said they were just drawn together.

Sounds kinda like some stupid animated reality tv show.

 

[Null]

Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food colouring. The doctor says I'm OK, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.

 

[comradekingu]

I will hunger-strike till i turn white in the face of your joke, for that shall be my dyet.

 

[ClockworkCoder]

Parents love to say "home sweet home", but then when you decide to put them in one...

 

[Null]

So what if I don't know what apocalypse means!? It's not the end of the world!

I was going to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time.

Always trust a glue salesman. They tend to stick to their word.

I was going to buy a book on phobias, but I was afraid it wouldn't help me.

If towels could tell jokes they would probably have a dry sense of humour.

The tale of the haunted refrigerator was chilling.

 

[PokeParadox]

I had a joke about taps, but I didn't want to faucet.

Why don't owls mate in the rain?
Because it's too wet to woo.

I went to an owl's party once, it was a hoot!

 

[Null]