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What’s the leading cause of dry skin?
Towels.
Towels.
(Bad)Joke Appreciation Corner
- Thread starter Løra (Lolla)
- Start date
A priest, a pastor and a rabbit entered a clinic to donate blood.
The nurse asked the rabbit: "What's your blood type?"
"I'm probably a Type O", said the rabbit.
Once upon a time, there lived a kind who was only 12 inches tall.
He was a terrible king, but he made a great ruler.
I'll let myself out.
The nurse asked the rabbit: "What's your blood type?"
"I'm probably a Type O", said the rabbit.
Once upon a time, there lived a kind who was only 12 inches tall.
He was a terrible king, but he made a great ruler.
I'll let myself out.
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How do you get a blind person to see? Usually by boat.
Null
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Confuzzled
Very Active Member
- Joined
- Oct 1, 2018
- Messages
- 301
Why couldn't Wilhelm Furtwängler go out in thunderstorms?
Because he was a lightning conductor
rygD
Nihilistic Mystic
I took some pictures of farmland. They all turned out grainy.
That's very funny.
But who got the last blitz?
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I’m done being a people pleaser.
If everyone’s ok with that.
If everyone’s ok with that.
Field Notice: FN - 63697 - Protective Boot on Certain Network Cables Might Push the Mode Button and Cause an Unexpected Reset on the 48-Port Models of Cisco Catalyst 3650 and 3850 Series Switches - Workaround Provided
Certain types of snagless Ethernet cables have protective boots that extend too far forward and above the plastic latching tab.When this type of cable is installed in Port 1 of any 48-port model of the Cisco Catalyst C3650 or C3850 Series switches, the boot might press and hold the Mode button...
www.cisco.com
Just pointing out that if you ever mess up an assignment, just remember Cisco, in one of their router models, strategically put a reset button just above the first port, which would be triggered if you use said port. No recall, just issue a warning.
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Why did Billy get fired from the banana factory? He kept throwing away the bent ones.
One time I brought this girl back to my place for a romantic meal for two. Things were going good and the conversation was flowing, that is until I brought out the food and set it in front of her. I can't help but notice the look of mild disgust as she stares down at her food. "What's wrong? You haven't touched your haggis and black pudding? Don't you like it?" I enquire. "No, the food looks great, it's just...these plates...are you sure they're clean?" she replies.
"Of course they're clean" I answer, slightly offended. "I use hot water and soap to clean all my cutlery thoroughly!"
Reassured, she begins to tuck into her food and the mood picks up again. After we're finished eating, she tells me she can hear noises upstairs.
"Oh, that's just my two dogs" I tell her. "I was just keeping them upstairs, I wasn't really sure if you were a 'dog person'"
"I love dogs!" she exclaims excitedly "Can I meet them?"
"Sure...
...Hot Water! Soap! Come on downstairs boys!"
"Of course they're clean" I answer, slightly offended. "I use hot water and soap to clean all my cutlery thoroughly!"
Reassured, she begins to tuck into her food and the mood picks up again. After we're finished eating, she tells me she can hear noises upstairs.
"Oh, that's just my two dogs" I tell her. "I was just keeping them upstairs, I wasn't really sure if you were a 'dog person'"
"I love dogs!" she exclaims excitedly "Can I meet them?"
"Sure...
...Hot Water! Soap! Come on downstairs boys!"
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The bank keeps calling me to give me compliments. They say I have an “outstanding balance”.
I'm uncultured, so I had to look it up, It defies the bada-bum-tsss.
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How much does Santa pay for parking?
Nothing it’s on the house.
Nothing it’s on the house.
Confuzzled
Very Active Member
- Joined
- Oct 1, 2018
- Messages
- 301
I think you missed an 'n' in defines. <sfx:Ricochet>
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Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because they were stuffed.
Because they were stuffed.
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Sundays are always a little sad, but the day before is a sadder day.
1forrest1
“Supplies!”
“Aye, matey.”
I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
I don’t know and I don’t care.
A man and a giraffe walk into a bar.
After a few drinks, the giraffe falls over and dies. The man begins to walk out when the bartender stops him.
“Hey, you can’t leave that lyin’ there!” The bartender yells out.
The man turns around: “It’s not a lion. It’s a giraffe.”
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Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it’d be a foot
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Cosmetic surgery used to be such a taboo subject. Now you can talk about Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.
