(Bad)Joke Appreciation Corner

[PokeParadox]

Jack and Rose are sat on the Titanic. She asks him how he takes his coffee.

Spoiler

decaff, frio.

 

[Null]

Priest: “Do you have any last requests?”
Murderer sitting in the electric chair: “Yes, can you please hold my hand?”

 

[Null]

He didn't tell his mother that he ate some glue. His lips were sealed.

 

[JDTAY]

He didn't tell his mother that he ate some glue. His lips were sealed.

Wooooo, party like it's 9/11/2021.

 

[Null]

So what if I don’t know what apocalypse means? It’s not the end of the world!

 

[Null]

I'm going to stand outside, if anyone asks where I am tell them I am outstanding.

 

[Null]

My friends say I'm getting fatter. In my defence I've had a lot on my plate recently.

 

[ible]

what's a flying squirrel's favorite food?

Spoiler

air corn.

 

[Null]

I couldn't figure out how to put my seatbelt on, but then it clicked.

 

[FBnil]

I recently heard about this young adult novel in which Schr̨ödinger's cat and Pavlov's dog team up for a cross country adventure...

So I headed to the library to see if they had a copy for my 10 year old daughter.

The librerian said that my description rang a bell but she wasn't sure if it was there or not.

 

[Null]

If at first you don't succeed then skydiving is not for you.

 

[Neelix]

Haven't you heard? That's what you need to do to fly - Throw yourself at the ground and miss!

-Neelix

 

[Null]

I've been thinking about learning Braille, but its a bit of a touchy subject.

 

[FBnil]

Why didn't the toiletpaper cross the road?

Spoiler: answer

Because it got stuck in a crack

 

[Null]

Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.

 

[ible]

i've been hearing about a lot of stuff that rhymes with "Sponge Bob Square Pants" for some reason.

there's a new clothing-sharing network for messy, tan people:

Spoiler

sun slobs share pants

i also just went to a cafe with very angular bushes; the food was pretty good, though.

Spoiler

lunch stop, square plants

one of my friends, Robert, was in an alternative garage band and was also into DnD. he didn't need one of his most powerful weapons for the latest run, so he lent this to one of the other players.

Spoiler

grunge rob's spare lance

 

[Null]

What’s the body temperature of a Tauntaun? Luke Warm.

 

[FBnil]

With the corona pandemic I have been increasingly listening more Tsjai *cough* ski...

Spoiler: Tsjai

*cough* *cough* *cough* *cough* *cough* *cough* *cough* *cough* ski

 

[rSl]

_________________________________________ / If you could get an erection, you would \ \ have no need for Emacs. / ----------------------------------------- \ \ .--. |o_o | |:_/ | // \ \ (| | ) /'\_ _/`\ \___)=(___/

 

[rSl]

________________________________________ / Would you rather have a 5-inch hard or \ \ an 8-inch floppy? / ---------------------------------------- \ \ .--. |o_o | |:_/ | // \ \ (| | ) /'\_ _/`\ \___)=(___/