Lines in a Movie that crack you up..? (no matter how many times you hear them)


From Batman Returns -


Oswald Cobblepot - "True, I was their number one son and they treated me like number two"


And


Alfred - "Sometimes it's a diversion to read such rubbish. Most of the time, it's a waste of time"


Love both of those.


But one of my all time faves is spoken by Cousin Eddie in National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation


"They had to replace my metal plate with a plastic one. Every time Catherine would rev up the microwave, I'd piss my pants and forget who I was for about half an hour."


Actually pretty much EVERYTHING in Christmas Vacation cracks me up - I've seen it dozens of times, but it still makes me laugh.
 
On vacation in Aruba at the moment and I have filled much of my time annoying my wife with film quotes, of which I know many. The fantastic staff at Bucuti are constantly asking how you´re feeling. So, my favorite quote at the moment is from Beerfest.


"Good enough to Fuck your mother!"
 
In the movie Norbit ( a nerdy and timid man played by Eddy Murphy ) Raspuchia ( a obese woman played by eddy Murphy ) wears her bikini to a water park . When she goes to the water slide the life gard says to her timidly " mam are you wearing bottoms ? " to which she replies with the lifting of her fat rolls .


Or perhaps any line whatsoever from " a Christmas story " . My favorite comedy of all time .
 
Or perhaps any line whatsoever from " a Christmas story " . My favorite comedy of all time .
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Funny enough I just watched that yesterday for the first time. Absolutely bonkers film. Loved every minute of it! :)
 
iprice said:
Or perhaps any line whatsoever from " a Christmas story " . My favorite comedy of all time .
Click to expand...
Funny enough I just watched that yesterday for the first time. Absolutely bonkers film. Loved every minute of it! :)
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Remember the scene where the dad buries his leg lamp ? Or the part where the boy curses over the dropping of a tool ? Or him actually shooting his glasses ? Weirdest thing - the red rider DOES NOT have a compass in the stock or sundial - although some random competing BB gun did ( they still make the red rider I have one from 06 and one from about 25 years ago ) .
 
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Funny you would post that Craig. I always imagined that something like the Pandora is what would have happened if Clive Sinclair and Chris Curry would have gotten along like you and ED. :)
 
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And, this line from The Great Escape makes me laugh a bit every time I hear it, from years back, though I am not exactly sure why as it is not generally a funny line...


the line where the Gestapo have Bartlett and Macdonald:

Ah, Herr Bartlett. And Herr MacDonald. We are together again. You're going to wish you had never put us to so much trouble!
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Even funnier when I'm on a high road and see a Barclays Bank and a McDonalds restaurant together ... It makes me think of this quote and I smile. "Bartlett" and "Barclays" sounding a bit similar in the accent.


Also from same film, Donald Pleasence saying "splendid".


I laugh for some reason.
 
Man, so many good quotes from so many great movies.


But without a doubt, one of the top lines in any movie, ever, from a great all around film - The Godfather:


"Leave the gun; bring the canoli" always cracke me up.. so out of place and funny :)


jeff


I need to replay Portal 2.. theres a game thats infinitely quotable. "We've both said and done things you're going to regret"
 
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When Sir Clive says "Clive Sinclair the man who brought you Jet Set ****ing Willy!!!"
 
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Mine seems a bit harsh and "undereducated" (but maybe so am I too):


Predator (1987)

If it bleeds, we can kill it
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If have to note though, that if find the localized Version a little more "cooler" than it is already
 
skeezix said:
I need to replay Portal 2.. theres a game thats infinitely quotable.
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haha, QFT, what a great game:


"I think we can put our differences behind us... for science... you monster."
 
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