Dr.who

[sam fisher]

the assistant should also have the ability to watch the camera as it rolls dramaitcally over soemthing of significance, while maintaining a deep stare into the beyond.


ahh wait thats silent witness

Will she also inherit the silent witness ability to diagnose people with illnesses and come up with their entire life history by discovering what brand of toothpaste some has used?

 

[Goity]

Captain hook is........Dr Who. Peter Pan can be the master in that case... And Tom Baker can be tinkerbell who can be the doctors assistant.

Neverland Neverland Neverland, we've had running water for over 10 years, and we invented the cat. But none of this would have been possible without the people of Neverland, and this is what here we do look at here today. Let's rock!

 

[WarmFluffyUK]

An Interview with Davros:

On meeting Darvros I was asked to sit, quite still and not to go fiddling with the “wheelchair”. The questions began:

Me: Davros, you were in charge of research on Skarow, what steered you in the direction of the creation of the Daleks?

Davros: Well, my people used to make fun out of my wheel chair. They used to shout things like “Nobby no legs”, “Hello Mr Can Can, but you can’t Can Can, can you?” and “How about a game of football wheezy”. So one day I decided to take my research in a whole new direction. I tried mutating one of the chief protagonists of my unfortunate situation. The result was amazing, a sort of sludge creature. Fref I called it, I still have it as a pet actually! Anyway, it wasn’t very mobile, so I designed a travel machine for it based on my wheel chair, the mark one travel machine was born. See what happens when you mock my wheels!

Me: Right okay… So your plans for the Dalek’s were stuffed up a bit by a certain Doctor?

Davros: WHAT!!!!!

Davros seemed annoyed at this question, I could tell he was annoyed by the dribble from his mouth. I decided to ask about the Doctor indirectly.

Me: So what caused the set back of the Daleks release into the universe? Was it because someone sealed them in the bunker?

Davros: Yes, and if I find out who did it, I will have them exterminated. Do you know who did it?

Me: Yes, he told me he did it.

Davros: Who did it?

Me: I know, you don’t have to keep telling me Who did it.

Davros: You’re not making any sense.

I could see the annoyance in his one electronic eye, so I let it rest.

Me: You called your pet Fref, I once had a Dog called Tore you know?

Davros: Dog Tore, are you trying to be funny?

Me: No no, he used to fetch sticks, did Fref have any good tricks?

Davros: Well he used to exterminate Thal’s for chocolate treats. I thought that was quite evil of him.

Me: Fref sounds a little nasty, didn’t he do anything nice?

Davros: That was nice you imbecile. Thal’s are the scum of Skarow. You know they actually die with a smile on their faces? Or was that the effect of the chemically enhanced death gas I created? If it was, then nice one me!

I believe I actually saw a smirk on the rubbery features of the old bag of evil.

Me: Back to the design of the travel machine, With its sleek inhumane design and whisk style death ray, what prompted you to throw a sink plunger on the end of a pole into the mix?

Davros: Why don’t you like it?

Me: Well it’s not that I don’t like it, but it’s not very functional is it.

Davros: NOT FUNCTIONAL? I will tell you this, skarow has the worst drainage system in the galaxy, you need sink plungers at times like this. If you didn’t have plungers, we would be up to our wheels in the dead Thal’s. They are the sludge of Skarow.

Me: I thought you said they’re the scum of Skarow?

Davros: Do you want an early death?

Me: Er, No thanks.

Davros: Then shut up, ask another question and make it snappy, I have to take Fref out for a quick exterminate soon.

The air was dank and quiet. Davros flicked a switch on his chair and a diet coke can popped up from the chair. I took it and drank.

Me: Thanks for that I was parched.

Davros: How dare you, that was my last can. Snider get this reporter out of here.

To Be Continued…..

EDIT: If you have a question for Davros, let me know and I will give you the reply!

 

[sam fisher]

He he. That was funny. Now the question is...can a Dalek get quicker than a quick fit fitter?

 

[WarmFluffyUK]

He he. That was funny. Now the question is...can a Dalek get quicker than a quick fit fitter?

Glad you liked it, I was allowed to see Davros again after nicking his diet Coke, and asked him your question, here's his reply:

Davros: Ah yes, the Quick Fit Daleks, QFD for short. I soon realised that the plunger wasn't versatile enough for planetary conquest, PQ for short. So I retro fitted a squad of Daleks with Quick Fit Tools, QFT for short, that allowed the rapid change of the Plunger Device, PD, for other More Useful Tools, MUTs.

Me: What Other Useful Tools, OUT for short, were they fitted with?

Davros's eye glared at me.

Davros: Just the usual stuff, Bigger Guns, BG for short, Welding Unit Devices, WUD, Ceremonial Occasional Party Poppers, COPP and Rapid Aperture Terror Strobes, RATS.

Me: You just made that up didn't you?

Davros looked at me, nose flaring with evil.

Davros: You're going the right way for a smacked bottom....

Me: Sorry, please continue.

Davros: I designed special Daleks for a Recovery And Upgrade Service, RUS. Some Units were designed to inject Lower rated Daleks with internal technology upgrades, they were part of the...... Kill Unit New Tech Sect.

I quickly stopped him.

Me: Thank you Davros, I'm sure Mr Fisher will be interested in your answer.

Davros: That's Mr Davros to you.

I quickly left.

 

[clarky2o2o]

ok my question to mr bob....er davros

who would win in a fight a dalek or an old lady on a moped with a pink hand bag?

 

[WarmFluffyUK]

ok my question to mr bob....er davros

who would win in a fight a dalek or an old lady on a moped with a pink hand bag?

I emailed this to Davros and I just got his reply:

Re: Dalek vs Old Lady

Dear Clare,

I have taken on board the rather interesting conundrum given to you by Master Clarky, and after weighing up all the variables I have formulated this answer.

The Dalek would win as it obviously has superior firepower and mobility. The mere thought of an old Woman being able to deflect a high energy beam with a pink handbag makes me laugh.

Addition: I have run this scenario through various simulations and found that the Old woman triumphed 63% of the time. I have surmised that she had the element of surprise, as a Dalek wouldn't perceive the old woman as a threat. Consequently the woman turned out to be a suicide Granny and promptly exploded shouting "I remember the war sonny". To counteract this, I have had 4 Daleks set aside as our think tank. They have now created the Exterminate Pink Handbag order, which is level 4 on the extreme kill scale.

Thank you for your help in making the Daleks supreme.

Love,
Davros.

-
- Dear Mr Davros,
-
- One of our forum members have raised an interesting question.
- Clarky asks "who would win in a fight a Dalek or an old lady on
- a moped with a pink hand bag?".
- Don't exterminate him, he's only curious, but I would love your
- views on using old women as a tactical element.
-
- Regards,
- Clare.
-

 

[sam fisher]

He he. How many Daleks would it take to Exterminate Bob Marley and all his music though?

 

[WarmFluffyUK]

He he. How many Daleks would it take to Exterminate Bob Marley and all his music though?

Back at the bunker, I find myself with on another tet-a-tet with old wrinkly, but don't tell him I called him that.

Davros: Who's Bob Marley?

Me: No, Who isn't Bob Marley, Who is someone you don't like very much.

Davros: Who don't I like?

Me: That's right, you can't stand the sight of him.

Davros: Stop messing about and tell me who this Marley figure is. Is he some sort of underground resistance leader for an anti-Dalek sect?

Me: No he's a musician from the planet Earth. Generally known for the Reggae style sing-a-long and hats knitted by his mom.

Davros: He wears silly head gear, doesn't he look pathetic?

Me: I wouldn't make fun of head gear if I was you.

Davros's chair jolted towards me.

Davros: WHAT????

Me: I said, er, Yes he's got funny head gear unlike you!

Davros: O'Kay.

I could see I had annoyed him.

Me: So how many Daleks?

Davros: Not telling you now.

Me: Oh go on.....

Davros: No!

He shouted, almost stamping his wheels on the ground. This went on for hours and finally he gave in.

Davros: My Daleks have borrowed some...

He went into an evil whisper.

Davros: Some Time Lord technology! ((((cue scary music))))

Me: Really?

Davros: Yes, and with it I can send a single Dalek back to before Mr Marley was born, Exterminate his parents. With such a Device I can set the DALEKS ABOVE THE GODS, and with this power I will, er, have such a device, so I can go back and er...

Me: Why don't you use it to prevent your mega accident?

Davros went quiet, contemplating.

Davros: If I went back in time, stopped my accident, but then I would't be here talking to you so I wouldn't have been given the idea to go back and stop my accident.

Me: Yeah, a bit of a temporal cockup innit.

Davros: What is this "temporal cockup" you speak of?

Me: Well thank you Davros, you have answered yet another ground breaking question! Stay tuned for more daytime sofa questions. See you all soon viewers!

Davros: Why are you talking to the wall?

 

[sam fisher]

he he he

 

[clarky2o2o]

:lol: good answer ok my final question (assumingly).

If a doctor can wipe out the entire Kaled...sorry Dalek race what could a nurse do?

 

[sam fisher]

:lol: good answer ok my final question (assumingly).

If a doctor can wipe out the entire Kaled...sorry Dalek race what could a nurse do?

Have kinkey dalek sex?

 

[WarmFluffyUK]

:lol: good answer ok my final question (assumingly).

If a doctor can wipe out the entire Kaled...sorry Dalek race what could a nurse do?

I did ask Davros this but he refused to accept that the Daleks could be wiped out by anything. He didn't have time to chat much as he was on his way to have physiotherapy. He did get in a huff when I said that I didn't know he was seeing a psychotherapist, it was only a joke.

He also said the Daleks have no concept of nurses. Just after that he was wheeled into a room and met by a blonde nymphet with a physiotherapist badge on. Bloody hypocrite!

 

[WrongEyedJesus]

ever worse than the Happyness Patrol from the McCoy era.

Oh Jesus, I'd forgotten about that. Truly atrocious.

 

[sam fisher]

I think the candy man would have been fun to eat. Well, if he wasn't made of polystyrene, that is.