Sorry Folks. It Had To Be Done.


BaDToaD

"Very" Old Timer
Joined
Jan 31, 2004
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Location
UK
Website
cwhippogames.wixsite.com
New years story in the style of Beartrix Potter well sort of.
Any resemblance to characters living or dead is entirely their own fault!



Once upon a time there was a little Rabbit called Toxibunny.

He and his friends Spam Fisher and Goity Threadbumber were out playing with their GP32s when along came Mr Bluplus.

"Hello boys." he said smiling. "I've got some belated Christmas presents for you." he said and handed them all shiny new GP32

Blus.

"I'll just take those old GP32s off your hands." he said snatching the lads GP32s and grinning evily.

The lads tripped off down the path grinning as they played on their gleaming new GP32s.

After a short while Toxibunny gasped.

"Oh No!" he excalimed. (He would have exclaimed but he was having a typing fit at the time.)

"What!" said Spam and Goity together.

"Oh No!" said Toxibunny again.

"What!" Shouted Goity and Spam once more.

"Bloody hell." said Toxibunny. "I can't get OpenSnes working anymore and Doom doesn't work either!"

"Shit" said Goity.

"There's no time for that." said Toxibunny "We need to go visit the GP32 Oracle. Mark"

Spam meanwhile was lying on the ground flapping like a goldfish, his mouth opening and closing almost as fast as his little

spam fingers flying accross a keyboard. This of course made a sound similar to a scooter nutter putting down the outside of

traffic in a most dangerous way and caused both Toxibunny and Goity Threadbumber to leap sideways into the hedge.

Goity poked his head out of the hedge looking both left and right. "Bloody hell Spam's having a fit."

"Shit" said Toxibunny.

"I thought you said there was no time for that."

"You're right said Toxibunny." and they picked Spam up and headed to Marks house which was just a tiny bit down the path.

Third tree on the right, turn left, walk forwards 10 paces, bounce off tree and sit down with a thud then turn right and walk

forwards 5 paces whereupon you will be standing on Marks doorstep.

"Come in." said Mark.

"Bloody hell he's quick isn't he?" said Goity.

"Yeah. I didn't even knock."

"putt putt putt." said Spam.

"Putt putt... er... put him over there in the corner with a paper bag on his head." said Mark gesturing to the semi concious

Spam.

"Will the paper bag help him recover?" asked Toxibunny.

"It's Possible, but I doubt it." said Mark "But he's such an ugly bugger."

"What can I do for you lads?" asked Mark.

"Mr Bluplus has stolen our GP32s" said Goity.

"Well not eaxctly stolen them." added Toxibunny.

"Go on." said Mark.

"Well he gave us these." said Toxibunny and handed a GP32 to Mark.

Mark raised a jewlers eyepiece up to his head nutting himself in the process.

"Ahhh... Oooooh... Ahhhh... Eeeeee..." he exclaimed.

"Oooooh" said Toxibunny and Goity together. "What can you see?"

"putt putt putt" said Spam.

"It's gamepark! They've changed the screen for a cheaper variant!"

"No!" said Toxibunny, Goity and Spam.

Everyone looked at Spam.

"Putt Putt Putt" said Spam.

"Yes." said Mark. We'll need to contact the coders as soon as possible.


----------------------------------------


Meanwhile at C.O.D.E.R.S headquarters in Utah, Wetah, Theytah, Alabammahshire. Reesy had made a startling discovery.

"These biscuits are really nice!"

"are they?"

"Yes!"


----------------------------------------


"Putt putt putt." said Spam.

"Have they no brains?" asked Goity.

"Sometimes I think they had them removed shortly after designing the original GP32." said Mark.

"I have no brain." said Spam. He had removed his bag and was back in the land of the living... just.

"I had this terrible dream." he said.

"Don't tell me you dreamt that your GP32 wouldn't play half your software anymore?" said Toxibunny.

"No I dreamt that a giant turtle was trying to shag me. I wouldn't have been worried but it was a racing turtle and could run

very very fast indeed." said Spam. "Luckily some bloke crashed into it on a scooter and killed it."

"This doesn't help us with the Bluplus situation." said Goity.

"No, you're right." said Mark.

"What Bluplus situation?" asked Spam.

Goity quickly filled him in.

"Shit!" said Spam rubbing his bruises.

"There's no time for that." said Toxibunny.

"Quick! to the Bat phone.! said Mark. We must contact the C.O.D.E.R.S.





Tuen in next week for more exciting adventures....
 
Heh, you have way...Way...WAY too much free time on your hands. ;) I'm really tired at the moment, I'm sure your post won't seem quite as mad when I read it again in the morning. :blink:
 
A fun little ditty indeed - I wonder if you could get someone to illustrate it as a cartoon and put them in as a series in the next issue of GPM or one of the other fanzines?
 
Heh, you have way...Way...WAY too much free time on your hands. ;) I'm really tired at the moment, I'm sure your post won't seem quite as mad when I read it again in the morning. :blink:

I bet it seems even worse now eh Reesy? hehe.

BTW parts 2 and 3 are even dafter than this one.
 
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That was bloody brilliant. Good job BaDToaD!
When I get my new GP32 I'll get straight to reading all your other comedy writing ;)
 
I'm on leave from work until Tuesday so I'm currently relaxed and therefore in a creative mood. I will probably be able to get about 5 or 6 chapters completed before I go back to work. If I publish them all at once you'll be screaming for chapters while I'm at work and less able to churn them out. I may put chapter two up later tonight but after that I'll have to pace them or I'll burn out :) LOL.

Rest assured though there are a total of 3 chapters completed already so there is quite a bit more to come even if I conk out creatively now.
 
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