I'm on the brown crunchy grass of New Jersey. For those of you from foriegn parts, just think of a place with all the filth, crime and rudeness of New York City, without all the culture and historic landmarks. Now make it about 100 times larger, throw in 600 Wal-Marts, and a strip mall every half mile. Oh, and did I mention the smell? Can you believe New Jersey's official nickname is the "Garden State"? Somebody either has a really screwed up sense of humor, or balls the size of canteloupes.
This message has been brought to you by the NJ Board of Tourism, and by the Mafia.